The Journey of Self-Discovery:
What Do You Need To Do To Find Your True Self?
Have you ever felt lost, wondering who you are beyond being a mum and what you’re going to do when the kids leave home? Do you crave a life filled with purpose, passion and fulfilment now that your children are becoming more independent? I certainly did and millions of other mums feel exactly the same way. You are not alone.
Let’s explore the journey of self-discovery: what it actually means and what you can do to help you find your true self and embrace a meaningful life.
What are the steps to finding your true self?
1. Reflect on Your Past
Reflecting on your past helps you understand how your life experiences have shaped you. Take time to think about significant moments, challenges and achievements.
Action Point: Create a timeline of your life, specifying key events and experiences. Write down how you felt and how these events or experiences might have influenced your beliefs and patterns of behaviour.
2. Identify Your Core Values
Your core values are the fundamental principles that guide your decisions and actions in life. Identifying these values will help you align your life with what really matters to you.
My main driver in life is social and relationships. I gravitate to meeting up with people above anything else. Now that I know this, I’ve embraced it as part of my life. I work with people all the time, I pursue my hobbies with others over doing solitary activities and I make time for meeting up with friends.
Action Point: Make a list of your top 10 values. Narrow it down to your top 5 and think about how you can incorporate them more into your daily life.
3. Explore Your Passions
Discovering your passions is so important for finding activities that bring joy and fulfilment to your life. Consider what activities make you lose track of time or what topics you can talk about all night long.
Action Point: Try new activities or get back into hobbies that you had before the kids. Think about what excites you and how you could do more of it. Note how you feel during and after the activity.
4. Write down what you want in life
Setting goals or desires gives you direction and motivation. They should be aligned with your values and passions to provide the necessary perseverance and resilience to pursue a truly fulfilling life.
Remember desires are not dreams, they are the blueprint for your reality.
Action Point: Write down your all goals and desires. Go wild, dream big. You have to think beyond your current circumstances, beliefs and limitations to grow and manifest what you want.
5. Practice Self-Compassion
Self-discovery can be challenging and it’s important to treat yourself with kindness and understanding. Again, something that we are not taught to do. Recognise that it’s okay to struggle or have setbacks, that’s just part of life. It's also part of life to learn to love ourselves unconditionally.
Action Point: Practice speaking kindly to yourself, like you would to a friend. When you catch yourself being self-critical, pause and reframe your thoughts into something more supportive and encouraging.
I despair the amount of times I used to say “I’ve achieved nothing today”, “I need to lose weight” or “I’m rubbish at…” I have learnt to reframe the way I talk to myself so my chat is now “I totally needed to rest today”, “my body is healthy and strong, I’m proud of what it can do” or “OK I didn’t run but I got out of bed and did a good walk today”.
Sounds a lot better, doesn’t it?
6. Embrace Change and Growth
Growth often involves stepping out of your comfort zone and embracing change. This can be daunting but it’s important for discovering your true self.
Action Point: Identify one area of your life where you feel stuck and take one small step towards changing it, whether it’s breaking a pattern, meeting new people or learning something new.
7. Build a proper support network
Surround yourself with people who support your journey of self-discovery. A team of people who are championing you and making you feel good provides a sense of connection and belonging, which is a huge contributing factor to happiness and fulfilment.
Action Point: Text or meet up with someone who makes you feel good and wants you to win at life.
Final Thoughts
Embarking on the journey of self-discovery is a really rewarding thing to do. By reflecting on your past, identifying your values, exploring your passions, setting goals, practicing self-compassion, embracing change and building a proper support network, you will uncover your true self which is a great foundation for a truly meaningful life of purpose and fulfilment.
Ready to start your journey of self-discovery? Subscribe to my newsletter for more tips and book some coaching or a course to get you on track. Your journey starts today.